If shitty days were to be measured on a scale from 1 to 10, where 1 stands for quarreling with your partner, your colleagues and your mum and 10 for being stung by a bee (you being allergic to bees) while being carried by an ambulance after being hit by a drunken elephant in the middle of Bucharest (if we have palm trees, why shouldn't there be elephants?), the chick's 9/11 would qualify straight for an 8.5.
In such a situation, any words of encouragement are useless. Either you can help the guy or you can't, and if you can't, then feeling sorry doesn't lead to anything. The road to hell is paved with good intentions...
Still, knowing that even on your shitty days (may it be a 1 or a 10) you can always depend on someone, that you have over-worried mums and friends who would try to move the world for you, that whatever happens you never walk alone, is a refuge in life, however bad days we have. In the end, all that matters are the people.
Showing posts with label Chick. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Chick. Show all posts
Friday, September 12, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Distant readings
Some relationships are doomed to never happen. Like when you meet at work, for instance, and working together requires a certain kind of distance, and you don't dare to show weakness or think pink around the other person.
But there is always some kind of distant revealing, which keeps you save and somewhat anonymous, but also lets the others have a glance at your deeper, inner self.
That's why I'm happy that of my former colleagues have started (or revealed that they always have been) blogging. Reading her, her or his blog leaves me feeling like I have known them forever and, no matter what will come, this could be going on.
What makes me even happier in all this is not only that they write, but that they write good and surprisingly beautiful, and that I came to read their posts not only out of interest and the desire to keep in touch, but out of sheer pleasure of reading and of getting in touch with their thoughts and ideas.
Very impressive: this and this.
And, out of topic but dedicated to the chick and her demons, this.
PS. If I ever wrote a nonsense book about my life, it would have deep green covers and a golden title. As I sometimes feel so old, that I guess I should write my book in gothic characters.
How would you picture your life-book-cover?
But there is always some kind of distant revealing, which keeps you save and somewhat anonymous, but also lets the others have a glance at your deeper, inner self.
That's why I'm happy that of my former colleagues have started (or revealed that they always have been) blogging. Reading her, her or his blog leaves me feeling like I have known them forever and, no matter what will come, this could be going on.
What makes me even happier in all this is not only that they write, but that they write good and surprisingly beautiful, and that I came to read their posts not only out of interest and the desire to keep in touch, but out of sheer pleasure of reading and of getting in touch with their thoughts and ideas.
Very impressive: this and this.
And, out of topic but dedicated to the chick and her demons, this.
PS. If I ever wrote a nonsense book about my life, it would have deep green covers and a golden title. As I sometimes feel so old, that I guess I should write my book in gothic characters.
How would you picture your life-book-cover?
Monday, March 24, 2008
Art du savoir vivre
Yesterday, the chick started blogging. Welcome!
And, as we are all used to from a chick who never fails to surprise me, with a very personal and sensitive post about postponing and enjoying.
Reading her post made me wonder about how my life evolved over the past weeks? months?, as I have been living in a kind of frenzy, wanting it all and wanting it now. And – strange thing – getting more than ever expected.
I guess what I’m trying to achieve with this post is to stop and breathe. For sometimes, even if the frenzy goes on and on, it’s nice to take a moment in time for yourself.
This is what the chick taught me in her post: you never lose yourself, no matter how much you postpone actually living, as long as you can still stop and watch the moon.
Btw, the trees have bloomed and they are absolutely beautiful.
And, as we are all used to from a chick who never fails to surprise me, with a very personal and sensitive post about postponing and enjoying.
Reading her post made me wonder about how my life evolved over the past weeks? months?, as I have been living in a kind of frenzy, wanting it all and wanting it now. And – strange thing – getting more than ever expected.
I guess what I’m trying to achieve with this post is to stop and breathe. For sometimes, even if the frenzy goes on and on, it’s nice to take a moment in time for yourself.
This is what the chick taught me in her post: you never lose yourself, no matter how much you postpone actually living, as long as you can still stop and watch the moon.
Btw, the trees have bloomed and they are absolutely beautiful.
Thursday, March 06, 2008
I think feminism is a misogynist movement
It all started from “The good wife’s guide”. I saw it, laughed and sent it to my female (and some male) friends. Just for fun, I thought. But little did I know then that I was to be overwhelmed by the feedback I was about to receive.
The first response came promptly, from a colleague who blamed me for completely ignoring all the beautiful, intelligent, independent women out there and giving men (who are, of course, misogynist bastards who just wait for a thing like this to make us feel like losers and request us serving them) the opportunity to mock at us.
At first, I took it as a joke. But then, feminist emails started over flooding my inbox. And I started to wonder…
What I have noticed at young women (including myself) is that they often lack orientation. The “traditional” female role has become obsolete a long time ago and doesn’t fit the modern woman anymore. We have become carrier women, pay our own bills (figurate speaking, too), are perfectly able to take care of ourselves and don’t need any (especially male) companionship in order to feel complete. We are sexually liberated and can screw whomever we want and when we want it, because, isn’t it, we are just gorgeous.
But on the other hand, we feel the constant need to prove something. We don’t need men, so we push them away when they want to love us. We don’t need a shoulder to cry on, so we find ourselves biting our tongues when we are down and pretending that everything is always absolutely beautiful. We don’t need any help in managing our jobs, so we overload ourselves with work and spend the nights at the office.
The immediate effect of this is that we start accumulating an immense quantity of negative energy. It’s what gives birth to passive-aggressive behaviour, because we wouldn’t ever accept to be caught crying or shouting – that’s NOT what a true professional does. And then we start sliding into prejudice and patterns of thinking.
“Men should be happy that we accept them around us”, a voice said to me, “that’s the real service that we do to them.”, “How dare you suggest that we should serve our men?”, some other voice cried, “it’s what most of them want anyway!”.
Somewhere, the mad voices lost me, or I lost all sense in trying to understand them. Isn’t a relationship based on mutual trust and communication? Shouldn’t we try to balance out our needs and wishes? Shouldn’t we try to make ourselves (and the other one) happy? Why this egocentrism (from either part)? And most of all, when did our sense of humour cease to exist?
Fact is, my dears, that, the Guide is a piece of history. It describes the post-war model for a woman. Yes, taken out of context, it might sound strange for the modern woman. But let’s not take ourselves too serious, and allow some self-irony.
Or, as the chick put it: It is us, dear friends, us women, who can be anything we want. We can serve, if we want, and we can rule, if we chose to, without having to prove anything to anyone.
That, my dears, is true emancipation and the only type of liberation, and not being always on the run and in eager competition with everything and everybody.
The first response came promptly, from a colleague who blamed me for completely ignoring all the beautiful, intelligent, independent women out there and giving men (who are, of course, misogynist bastards who just wait for a thing like this to make us feel like losers and request us serving them) the opportunity to mock at us.
At first, I took it as a joke. But then, feminist emails started over flooding my inbox. And I started to wonder…
What I have noticed at young women (including myself) is that they often lack orientation. The “traditional” female role has become obsolete a long time ago and doesn’t fit the modern woman anymore. We have become carrier women, pay our own bills (figurate speaking, too), are perfectly able to take care of ourselves and don’t need any (especially male) companionship in order to feel complete. We are sexually liberated and can screw whomever we want and when we want it, because, isn’t it, we are just gorgeous.
But on the other hand, we feel the constant need to prove something. We don’t need men, so we push them away when they want to love us. We don’t need a shoulder to cry on, so we find ourselves biting our tongues when we are down and pretending that everything is always absolutely beautiful. We don’t need any help in managing our jobs, so we overload ourselves with work and spend the nights at the office.
The immediate effect of this is that we start accumulating an immense quantity of negative energy. It’s what gives birth to passive-aggressive behaviour, because we wouldn’t ever accept to be caught crying or shouting – that’s NOT what a true professional does. And then we start sliding into prejudice and patterns of thinking.
“Men should be happy that we accept them around us”, a voice said to me, “that’s the real service that we do to them.”, “How dare you suggest that we should serve our men?”, some other voice cried, “it’s what most of them want anyway!”.
Somewhere, the mad voices lost me, or I lost all sense in trying to understand them. Isn’t a relationship based on mutual trust and communication? Shouldn’t we try to balance out our needs and wishes? Shouldn’t we try to make ourselves (and the other one) happy? Why this egocentrism (from either part)? And most of all, when did our sense of humour cease to exist?
Fact is, my dears, that, the Guide is a piece of history. It describes the post-war model for a woman. Yes, taken out of context, it might sound strange for the modern woman. But let’s not take ourselves too serious, and allow some self-irony.
Or, as the chick put it: It is us, dear friends, us women, who can be anything we want. We can serve, if we want, and we can rule, if we chose to, without having to prove anything to anyone.
That, my dears, is true emancipation and the only type of liberation, and not being always on the run and in eager competition with everything and everybody.
Friday, November 23, 2007
Cool stuff
Today's Bucharest was freezing in every possible way.
So there I was, standing next to the chick and the kitten, a tiny cup of coffee in my hand and trying to steal some warmth from it, as both chick and kitten were freezing and could have used some warmth and sunshine themselves, let alone give me some for myself.
On my way home, I walked the cold streets of the city and thought about the different freezing moments in our lives. And moreover, how absurd it is that we try to be cool day after day, freezing our souls on the way until their are completely paralyzed .
Reaching a cold and unfriendly home, I called the duck in search for a warming word. I didn't find it there, the duck had his cool day today.
At moments like this, people ask you to "chill" and "cool down". Err...guess that should work: I'm freezing to death here, being "cool" with it shouldn't be a problem hence.
So there I was, standing next to the chick and the kitten, a tiny cup of coffee in my hand and trying to steal some warmth from it, as both chick and kitten were freezing and could have used some warmth and sunshine themselves, let alone give me some for myself.
On my way home, I walked the cold streets of the city and thought about the different freezing moments in our lives. And moreover, how absurd it is that we try to be cool day after day, freezing our souls on the way until their are completely paralyzed .
Reaching a cold and unfriendly home, I called the duck in search for a warming word. I didn't find it there, the duck had his cool day today.
At moments like this, people ask you to "chill" and "cool down". Err...guess that should work: I'm freezing to death here, being "cool" with it shouldn't be a problem hence.
Monday, November 12, 2007
How the kitten made my day
Today I met the kitten and the chick again for a short cup of coffee - a very short cup of coffee, as we all had shit to do...
However, in the short time we talked, the kitten managed to stunt me again: when looking back to the last 6 years of my life, he said, I can't see more than a dozen things I would do exactly the same if I had the choice.
Yeah, I answered, but if you hadn't lived the way you did, you wouldn't be the person you are right now anymore.
Yeah, the kitten answered, that's exactly my point.
I never was the reflective type - my life is a continuum of heres and nows, and I never really stopped to think about the past and what went wrong or right in my life. Actually, I always regarded the past as something that is given to you and that couldn't be changed.
But on second thought, actually, I think you could change something, as your individual past is build up of all your memories and the weight you give them in your personal history. And while facts cannot be altered, the way you relate to them can. So you can chose to have happy memories or sad ones, to have done wonderful things or wicked ones, and finally, to love who you have become or hate it.
HERO OF THE DAY: The kitten. He might not be able to change his past, but he is definitely able to change his future.
However, in the short time we talked, the kitten managed to stunt me again: when looking back to the last 6 years of my life, he said, I can't see more than a dozen things I would do exactly the same if I had the choice.
Yeah, I answered, but if you hadn't lived the way you did, you wouldn't be the person you are right now anymore.
Yeah, the kitten answered, that's exactly my point.
I never was the reflective type - my life is a continuum of heres and nows, and I never really stopped to think about the past and what went wrong or right in my life. Actually, I always regarded the past as something that is given to you and that couldn't be changed.
But on second thought, actually, I think you could change something, as your individual past is build up of all your memories and the weight you give them in your personal history. And while facts cannot be altered, the way you relate to them can. So you can chose to have happy memories or sad ones, to have done wonderful things or wicked ones, and finally, to love who you have become or hate it.
HERO OF THE DAY: The kitten. He might not be able to change his past, but he is definitely able to change his future.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)