Mad post

Sometimes I can't help but thinking that the most depressive people are the ones who get obsessively bored with their lives.

So I know this girl, let's call her the pussy-cat. The pussycat has never had a real job in her entire life, although she's almost 27 now. She still lives with her parents and, although not being without some kind of intelligence and beauty, she has neither a boyfriend nor any close friends.
She isn't interested with anything that happens outside her narrow little universe*, has no clue about human relationshipping and keeps obsessing about her sad little life and the fact that fate was so deeply unfair with her, as she has nothing that could make her feel accomplished and attractive to others.

Here's where I have to say - that's true. My dear, life is no passive item that goes by unacknowledged, nor any beforehand established chain of events that will happen no matter what your actions are or are not. I think the power to change lies with ourselves, and weeping about our sad little existence will not lead to major changes, nor to any kind of alteration in our relationships.

So if you feel unattractive and unloved and lonely beyond the usual ups and downs that pass us all in the course of our lives - it's probably true and that's who you are.

Now if you expect mercy and pity from my part - it will not come. For I don't see how myself showing pity could ever help you get along with your oh-so-miserable existence. Moreover, don't expect me to be your friend out of pity - as I never was a mercy-fuck to anybody and don't intend to start with it at this old age.

I never had any understanding for whiners, as I have been meeting real misery and suffering during the years and that doesn't ever match up with weeping. So if you want me to help you solve your problem, or listen to you - I will, gladly. However long it takes, if at the end I can see you getting on your feet and taking charge of your life again, I will be there for you.

But if the mere intention of your weeping is me mercy-fucking you (physically or intellectually), you're barking up the wrong tree. I never was extraordinary merciful and never pitied out of pure desire to come over as a "good" person. Moreover, I don't think that my role as a friend or listener is to feel sorry for you, but to make you see beyond your own (subjective) point of view and don't get stuck on preconceived ideas.

I guess that doesn't make me a desirable person after all, but I really hope that for my special few it makes me a better friend.

*Quotation from the pussycat, when some guy told her he went to Afghanistan: "So did you go there on vacation? How was it?"

De ce imi place in Chisinau

-Nume de magazine: "Miini dibace", "Gospodarul", "Albina", "Mesterul casei", "Tineretea 94-Frizerie", "SC Fertilitatea Chisinau SA";

-Reclame: "Ia-ti prietenii si inhata ocazia" (Zero Lei minutu' de telefonie), "Daca ai hotarat sa ai relatii intime, procedeaza corect";

-Dictionar:

"l-o palit si din fata si din spate" - "accident in lant"
"dupa ograda, in colt" - "la coltul strazii"
"tine bagajele in salon" - "va rugam sa luati bagajele in masina"
"traiesti aici?" - "la ce camera stati?"
"dievodjka" - "domnisoara"
"strasnic" - "groaznic"
"agentie de ritual" - "pompe funebre"
"adica" - "aaaaaaa"
"la carma" - "conducerea companiei"
"vin ciobanii sa-si asigure vitica" - "vin ciobanii sa-si asigure vitica" (mda, that happens)
"ii un pic bija" - "e frig ca dreaq"

Love-hate -second edition

Bob aime aujourd'hui: the sun and the blossomed trees, me walking home alone and having the time to chew on some thoughts, dark chocolate.

Bobe n'aime pas aujourd'hui: the lack of sensational of a working day, not being able to smile as often as I wished, some pointless lie.

Nerv

Sfarsitul de saptamana este pentru bucuresteanul mediu un timp al relaxarii urbane.

Se trezeste omul de dimineata, se imbraca frumos, cand e bine dispus face chiar dus, isi incarca familia in masina si purcede intr-o adevarata calatorie initiatica.

Spre mall.

Acolo, in Tara Sfanta a Consumerismului Idiot, subiectul nostru se plimba nonsalant pe coridoarele lungi cu vitrine colorate, rade zgomotos, vorbeste la telefon cu neamurile de la tara, de parca ar mana vitele, urla infuriat la nevasta si copii, explicandu-le rotund si suficient de ce ei sunt prosti iar el nu e, in fine, omul umple cu prezenta lui tot spatiul disponibil din mai sus numitul loc initiatic.

Calatoria se sfarseste apoteotic alaturi de un hamburger soios sau o bucata de pizza, mancate muncitoreste, cu inghitituri mari, intrerupte din cand in cand de un ranjet larg (cand trece o duduitza colorata) sau de o ragaitura infundata.

Dupa cateva ore, familia se incarca inapoi in vehicul si se transporta acasa. Pe drum, va fi delectata cu muzica unui claxon in care pumnul se infige viril la pornirea masinii si care va urla frenetic pana la finele calatoriei de intoarcere din Taramul Promisiunilor - eventual intrerupt uneori de un infundat " 'ratz ai dreacu".


Iesim in lume azi? Iesim, dar nu parasim incinta.

Change the world or change ourselves

Later edit for "I hate my job", as promised: This guy gets straight to the point.

Which makes me wonder: Do we all start as dreamers and end up bitter and disappointed? Or is there still a chance for us to change the world? Does being a grown-up mean you have to be burned out and bored by things you used to like?

Or is the answer to all our problems still the inflationately used word "love"?

Loves and hates (Volume II)

The ant aime aujourd'hui: "the tip of my nose being electrified when touched with a green smile, the warmth of my friends dancing around me, my toffee body butter that smells wonderful, the birthday of two dear ones."

The ant n'aime pas aujourd'hui: "friends going through some unhappy times (like Bob or C), my mother being in hospital, some people close to my office who live in an old Dacia, how things don't always work out my way and that I see old friends more seldom"

Check out the ant for more beautiful insights.

Loves and hates (Volume I)

Okay, people, here it is, my super-secret and politically incorrect loves and hates list (err... secret until now, when everybody reading this site will know of it):

Bob aime: walking in the rain (even when it's freezing) and the warm tea afterwards, watching a movie on Saturday morning while drinking a long coffee, walking with untied shoelaces and stepping over them, coffee with honey, staying in bed all day reading a book, cold noses, hot kisses, showering hot until her fingertips get all red and crumbled, coconut scent, big red apples, white cheese, men carrying flowers, old couples holding hands, green eyes, green everything actually, psychological discussions, grinning to people on the street, Alice in Wonderland, Jane Austen, ducks, make love not war, freezing winter mornings, Advent, first times, second times, understatement, tulips, everything German.

Bob n'aime pas: hot and dusty summer days, cold showers in the morning, cars, people who smell, malls, sauces, pork, talking loud, interrupting someone when speaking, intolerance, bad grammar, thin walls and people quarreling beyond them, milk in the coffee, blue eyes, wet socks, minimalism, people who know everything, crying to make a point, mobile phones with gadget value, make-believe. Enfin, sometimes Bob doesn't like herself. But only some rare times.


Do see this as an open invitation - send me your loves and hates, and I promise I will publish them in a series of posts with all my darling pets:-).