Before starting, it must be said that I never was a 100% sincere person. And also, that I think whoever claims to always be sincere, is just more or less a hypocrite, which annuls the sincerity clause from the start.
There is a certain amount of untruth we all carry forward, whether from the desire to be liked more or from the fear of some fierce consequences of our actions (or inaction). Also, I think that people have more than one sincerity, depending on whom they are inter actioning with. That makes the whole "always be sincere" claim even harder to achieve, as our characters and dispositions are more or less a mirror of our dear ones, friends and lovers.
Not being without fault myself, it might seem hard to understand that I expect a high degree of honesty from my friends.
What I mean by that is that because friendship is entirely a matter of choice, there is nothing compulsory in it. You don't have to do things to impress the other, you needn't pretend to be something you're not, you needn't find excuses when you don't feel like talking. Well, let's just say you shouldn't have to :-).
When I love, I always love the person as a whole. What is generally known as "faults" are simply a matter of interpretation. I remember someone telling me once that he thinks the fact that I am too independent is a fault, while someone else loved just that about me. In the end, it all balanced out :-).So why pretend?
The great thing in a great relationship is that you are being loved for what you are.
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As seen by Bob.
About Me
- Bob
- A passionate listener.
Quote of the day
Wazzup?
Them beautiful characters
Quotes
Albert Einstein: "Imagination is more important than knowledge".
Jane Austen: "Maybe it's our imperfections that make us so perfect for each other."
Oscar Wilde: "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation."
Jane Austen: "Maybe it's our imperfections that make us so perfect for each other."
Oscar Wilde: "Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation."
11 comments:
being love for what you are?!?! i wonder is that true or you are just loved for the perspective that the other person sees as you or sees what he/she wants to see in you and not the real you....we don't pretend to be someone we are not but from person to person maybe our reactions are different .... something which I don't think that it's right ....can we actually love someone for what they are ??? i think we can but not everyone wants or is capable to make that effort...
couldn't agree more, vladutze! i come to think about it...there are stories being built for every person I know. Just that for some of them, the story is pretty close to reality and I end up calling it: "I know you/him/her very well". U cannot love someone for what they are, as u can never know what they are. Bright side of all this: building stories around ppl makes it easier for you to love them! :)
P.S. i am being optimistic today :)
don't dare to comment back that you can get dissapointed on this approach ;)
I dare! But not to be disappointed, but to add: in life we play all these different roles (you know the song: bitch, lover, child, mother), and some of them suit us better and are easier to bring through. Maybe this is what we really are, the role that comes about with the least effort.
Call me a dreamer, but: What I love about people is when they stop trying to be lovely.
I guess it's enough when we build stories around a person, she/he/(it?) shouldn't bother to build even more:))).
Well, trying to be lovely doesn't always result is being lovely. This is what the stories around ppl you love can never include -trying - they're all natural in playing all those roles. But, going even further...playing roles is good as long as they define you and do not help you pretending.
Hello ye all.
Agree with Bob, being loved for what and how you are is even more exceptional than vanilla ice cream. On the other hand, the only reality we have is here and now, so playing roles can only postpone what Germans call "Genuss". I will expand on this later...
Good one, Danachen! If you love vanilla ice cream, then:
1. You couldn't love it more if you pretended it was chocolate.
2. You will notice it's not vanilla, even if it's wrapped up in vanilla paper.
But then, what do you do with vanilla flavoured icecream? Do you notice it's not the real thing or do you pretend it's the real thing just because there's so much lack of vanilla icecream in the world?
Which reminds me, we should all eat some icecream together some time. Si la propriu, si la figurat;-).
This is way too complicated, let me unwind... :) Love is good as long as you are loved the way you are, without being conditioned. If you see the love you are willing to give or the friendship you are offering (ore are being offered). If you don't get the real thing, you just walk away. No need to waste affection in vain.
Harshly said, but very true. If we all just had the balls to walk away when our affection seems wasted...
It's less about balls than about self-preservation. We don't want to live in the waste land, 'cause we are hedonistic self-indulgers who find pleasure in making others happy. To some extent.
Se numeste psihologie sociala si ne invata cum se schimba omul cand intra in orice fel de relatie cu semenii sai.
In dragoste, mai ales, omul se preface la greu. Daca am fi ceea ce suntem cu adevarat, barbatii ar avea barba de doi coti si femeile par pe picoare. Si nici nu s-ar spala. Noroc cu educatia ca ajungem sa fim sociabili... fiuh... adica, repet, diferiti de omul natural...
Sau cum zicea prietenul nostru JJ Rousseau, nu-i asa, "omul se naste bun de la natura, dar societatea il corupe".
Si asa de bine esti educat ca iti devine o a doua natura, si chiar ajungi ferm convins ca esti "tu insuti".
Putina umilinta, zau asa
Isn't everything in life we do just to be loved a little more?
Putina toleranta, zau asa...
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